Mourning Rituals
Grieving during the Gilded Age was influenced by Queen Victoria’s mourning period after the death of her husband, Prince Albert. During the last 40 years of her life she practiced mourning rituals like wearing all black and isolating herself from society. These practices were adopted by some in Elmira and were reinforced by etiquette manuals.
The Gilded Ideal
For an upper class widow, mourning publicly meant using clothing to show her grief. Since people found it difficult to discuss death, dark clothing and jet jewelry helped women symbolically mourn. Rituals like this gave women a designated mourning plan, which provided them comfort and a way to move forward from death.
The Tarnished Reality
The expectations set forth by mourning rituals highlighted class differences. Practices like isolation, purchasing special mourning clothing, and extended mourning periods made grieving an expensive process. Poorer women could not afford to follow these rituals. The inability to “properly” mourn a loved one’s death showcased some women’s low social and economic status.
